DOES RECONCILIATION WORK?

I have had days when my thinking gets clouded with doubts and more doubts! Will I ever be able to make it on my own? What will happen to the kids? How will I make ends meet? Thoughts of reconciliation have occurred as I walk along the most turbulent path in my life.

Does reconciliation really work? I’m not sure if after giving things a second chance, whether my husband will again fall back into his old pattern and habits. Isn’t it harder to approach divorce after that? I’m not saying reconciliation will not work, but if it doesn’t, then what?

Looking back on my marriage, I feel I expected an ideal husband, which he was far from. I kept hoping he would conform. But today, ten years and two kids later, I know an “ideal” husband or an “ideal” marriage does not exist. I’ve tried compromising, but to no avail, since the other person is not willing to change!

If we did reconcile, would I be able to forget the pain, the betrayal, the shame and the hurt? Is it enough for him to say sorry, promise to change, and then go back to being his old self?

Do we think about reconciliation because of its comfort level? Marriage makes us comfortable, and we long to go back to the familiar. Is it the fear of the unknown that makes us want to reconcile our differences?

When marriages go through troubled times, is reconciliation the answer, or is it better to make a clean break, and a fresh beginning? Are there women out there who have faced this situation in their lives? If there are, I’d love to know what their experiences were. I am not keen to go in for a divorce, even though I know things are not working out, at the same time, I’m wary of going in for a reconciliation, for fear of getting hurt once again. How can I tackle this situation? Any ideas?

Its only on sitagita that I can dare to think aloud!

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