Out Laws ?

Marriages are for ages, whether in this life or beyond several ages. But is it true that we are able to cope together in just one given life at present? The one we can see & is in front of us, who knows what will happen in our next life. Are we going to get the same partner again with whom it's not possible to live just one life or whom we love s--o----o-----o---------o much but who hardly understands the meaning of true love? It will not be wrong to say who doesn't know ''L'' of love! One thing I have realized, the tuning between husband & wife, which is important. But in most of the marriage gone wrong, in-laws play a vital role. They want in return from their son, being their child, as if it's the "vasooli" time for them. They only think of their comfort not of their children's happiness. There is a lot to say but time is not permitting. If you people like my view or if you consider it from any angle please let me know.

shivangi

Your Comments

I can understand what you are going through...it is true parents play a vital role in make ups as well as break up.....but what ever our society says marriage is between two people....if it is fine between husband and wife one should give it a shot but if it doesn't click it is time to give your relationship a thought....and for "vasooli" see if you go to the core of any relationship its all selfish....it is just that in a son parents relationship it is done in a very open way....give it a thought boy's mother is the one who has the most "armaan" of getting his son married and then she is the one who creates most problems in his marriage....I think it is all about insecurities. Unless it is a total gone case. Mother in law can be handled by taking care of the things which will make her insecure....try not to do things which she will notice...if a mother and son are in habit of going out together don't come in between. if they hug each other in morning let them go ahead yaar...we also get jealous and forget that out 100% husband is a son to someone, brother to someone...its a saying if you love a person let him go if he comes back to you then only it is true love. But that doesn't mean that it is for guys only...what ever you have been doing with your parents you also continue doing...let him also feel jealous and have the taste of it and let him understand that its not you who doesn't understand...jealously is normal it happens with everybody. I have noted one thing about guys: they only understand a situation if they are given the taste of it. Let them taste it then they will learn how to do it next time. So the next time he hugs his mom he will give you you a nice look which will make you comfortable....if it works do tell me.

Name :sonal

Hello sonalji, first of all I would like to say thanks to you for giving your time to my thoughts. I read your views but I am interested in knowing, if you are married. If yes then tell me honestly . I am asking this because then only you can really understand the situation for it's very easy to give such a thought but difficult when the whole team of your in-laws are selfish & has nothing to do with their own candidate then leave apart the question of having any intimacy or attachment with the girl. Can you believe any girls father-in-law saying or in fact complaining to her mother that I don't like my son & daughter-in-law i.e her daughter, laughing all the time and me & my wife can't see them in a happy & giggling mood when they come out of their room in the morning. Can you believe a father passing such a comment for his own son just because he never used to do this with his own wife, as such was not the atmosphere in his time. When I told this to my hubby he said it's fine. How will you manage with a hubby with complete blind faith in his family despite the fact that you can see every one is cheating him & if you make him realize, will he believe it or not? Also if you have your hubby's bhabhis you are selfish too & he pays same attention which a husband only should pay to his wife, what he buys for you he buys the same for them & their husbands. Does not pay attention to you in view of respecting you for that much at least? I can express this so clearly for I am suffering the same along with 9 months old baby boy. Can u satisfy me with your ans. The insults I have gone through, the cunning behaviour I face from every body & when your own spouse ditches you, how does it feel, I know. No matter what I did or do for them, it is not mentioned any where, but only insults have become the way of life. I don't know why am I sharing all this with you though you are unknown to me, but I still did. Thanks for bearing with me.

Name :shivangipuneet

Dear Shivangi I have been married for the past twenty five years and leading a happy married life. I have a daughter who shall become a bride in a few years time. I think I can make some suggestions to you ! Believe me Peresverance Pays ! It pays in richly everything we do ! The reason we have problems in everything is we do not stay longer and our fears overwhelm our faith. My husband used to say that the pillars of marriage are " TRUST" "TOUCH" "TOGETHERNESS" and "TALK". Every effort must be made to make these pillars stronger. Do not worry about dowry,materialistic things etc. They are there in every marriage and relationships. A woman marries with the expectation that she can change the husband with time and man marries with the idea that his wife will not change. In reality just the opposite happens and both end up in having disappointment. Go with an open mind and have faith ! Please note that Indian marriage is not just the relationship between a boy and a girl, but two families ! That is the only reason for the success of our society. Good Luck ! ..:-)
Name : JAYASHREE MUGUNTHAN

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